A Little Slide Downward

I usually forgive just about everything as soon as I am aware that I am feeling annoyed, hurt or upset.  After all, I have a forgiveness lifestyle.  Forgiveness keeps me happy and it keeps my world easy and comfortable to live in.  So I value and appreciate my life lessons and try to forgive my world each day.  

But last week I had a little slump.  Here's what happened.  Right before bed one evening, my husband snapped at me when I was trying to tell him about our plans for the next day.  Instead of overlooking and forgiving him, I got annoyed.  And I kept feeling annoyed because...I LIKED IT!  I indulged myself.  I let myself get good and angry with him.    

And here's what happened next...

I woke up at 3 AM and was unable to go back to sleep. The next morning as we were trying to meet our friends to ski together, we missed the bus they were on.  Then we went to get my iphone out of our ski locker so we could make a plan to meet up with them later.  We found my phone submerged in an inch of vegetable juice in the bottom of my purse (I had tossed in a plastic bottle of the stuff on the run to meet our friends... smart?)  I turned it on and shorted it out, killing it permanently.

All afternoon I continued to feel annoyed with my husband...so he, of course, began to act really annoying.  I went to bed feeling hurt and put upon.  The next morning was my birthday.  None of my friends and family called to wish me Happy Birthday.  Well, actually, they did, but my phone was dead, of course.  Now I began to feel sorry for myself.  Then I burned my hand cooking dinner.  Next, my husband, in an effort to repair a broken light sconce in our powder room, somehow shorted out the electricity in half our house.  I went to bed with business worries on my mind instead of my usually peaceful thoughts.

At this point I began to recognize that my switch from thinking with love to thinking with fear was beginning to do a little damage in my life.  I could get a new phone, my hand would heal, my husband could  repair the light fixture.  I figured I'd better stop while I was ahead.  If I didn't, I'd risk drawing some seriously bad stuff into my life.  

And so I forgave him.  I felt better.  He felt better.  A new phone arrived in the mail.  The light sconce got fixed.  My hand stopped hurting. I got a good night's sleep.  My clients all emailed or called with happy messages.  Best of all, there were Happy Birthday wishes waiting for me on my new phone.  

My world keeps reminding me that happiness is a choice.

This is often what actually happens in real life.  When we are acting with the ego and living in fear, we create problems and upsets in our lives.  When we forgive and choose to join our thoughts with the Holy Spirit, we create peace and happiness.  Watch your life and see if you don't see similar patterns emerging.

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Choose Again

A Course in Miracles tells us that in every moment we have the opportunity to choose again.  This means that we can always change our thinking.  It's only thought.

Thought changes surprisingly easily.  It really does.  But it requires a decision on our part to want it to change.  Try it sometime.  When you find yourself stewing about somebody or something, make a decision to let it go.  Send light and love to whomever you are annoyed with or hurt by.

You'll probably feel resistant to this for a moment.  That's because the ego loves to flare up the flames of resentment.  It's in the ego's best interest to keep you stewing.  Just push past those feelings and force yourself to change your thought.  Get past any feelings of distaste you have toward forgiving whomever is upsetting you and just do it!!

Surround your trespasser in light and then surround yourself, too.  Give these grievances over to the Holy Spirit.   In a few moments you'll be amazed at how differently you can feel.

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Another Quickie Forgiveness Process

Although I am primarily a Course of Miracles student, I love the way the Science of Mind folks pray.  They are so good with words and their intentions are so clear.  Just read some Ernest Holmes if you want to see what I mean.

This is a lovely little prayer which is commonly used in Science of Mind practice and can be directed toward another person.  It is often used for healing or aiding a prayer partner.  However, I think it also makes a perfect little forgiveness process.  Just insert the appropriate name in the blank.

Affirmation for Self and Prayer Partner

There is one life.  This life is good.  This life is God.  This life is my life now.  In knowing that I am one with the life that is God, I know that I am whole, perfect, prosperous and complete in Mind, Body and Spirit.  I rely on Spirit revealing a healing in my life and in the Life of __________.   I know for ____________ that s/he is an expression of the Divine and that Divine right action is the truth of ____________'s experience in all ways.  Gratefully, I release this word, knowing it is so.  And so it is.  

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Hmmmm....Grievances or God?

Which do you choose?

Do you want to hang on to your grievances?  Stoke the flames of resentment?  Keep the anger and the hurt going?

Or would you rather be happy?

"My Grievances hide the light of the world in me.

My grievances show me what is not there and hide from me what I would see.  Recognizing this, what do I want my grievances for?  They keep me in darkeness and hide the light.  Grievances and light cannot go together, but light and vision must be joined for me to see.  To see, I must lay my grievances aside."  --A Course in Miracles Workbook Lesson 85 

Let in the light and discover what true happiness feels like.  Start a regular forgiveness habit today and  swap your grievances for inner piece.

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Love Holds No Grievances

"Grievances are completely alien to love.  Grievances attack love and keep its light obscure.  If I hold grievances I am attacking love, and therefore attacking my Self.  My Self thus becomes alien to me.  I am determined not to attack my Self today, so that I can remember Who I am."    --A Course in Miracles, Workbook, Lesson 84

Let's try to have a day where we let it all go.  Let's just give all our anger, our pain, and our frustration over to the Holy Spirit.  

Build an altar to the Holy Spirit in your mind.  Make it huge and covered in white shining marble.   Let it be beautiful!  Whatever you place on that altar goes up in flames of white searing light as the Holy Spirit takes your burdens and transforms them into love.

Now, whenever you feel annoyance or hurt, just place those feelings on your altar.  Give them to the Holy Spirit.  They're not your work anymore.  Let the Holy Spirit figure out what to do with all the grievances in your life.  It's his specialty.  You'll be surprised at what He will do with them!

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Get Mad First

Your feelings are your feelings.

Not everyone is advanced enough to simply turn the other cheek right after they've been slapped on the first side.  We're not all capable of living like Jesus...yet.  We're not all bodisatvas!

That's okay.  When the world dishes out hurt, pain and anger, it's fine for us to feel these feelings.  For awhile.

In fact, feeling the feelings is the perfect first step in the forgiveness process.  Go ahead.  Expand the feelings. Intensify the feelings.  Wallow in them.  Are you mad?  You bet!  Were you wronged?  You bet.  Feel it. You go!

But remember, this is only the beginning--you have work to do.  Forgiveness work.

After a little bit, it's time for our inner wisdom to shine in and let us know that we must forgive these trespasses.  Okay, so we've indulged our ego for awhile. But now it's time to turn it around.  See the bigger picture. Switch from fear to love.  Give it over to the Holy spirit.

Remember, it's only the body that's been harmed.  It's your ego that is flaring up these feelings.  Your Mind is not harmed.  The part of you that you share with God is not harmed in one little bit.  The biggest part of you...the real part of you, is perfectly safe with God.  Dwell here and let the rest go.

Heal your trespasser with your offering of forgiveness and heal yourself in the process.  When you take them to God, you go there, too.

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New!!  Downloadable Forgiveness Meditations: $2.99 Each    Click here.

Learn and practice quick and easy processes for forgiving the people and events in your life that are causing you upset and pain.  Forgiveness is the key to happiness...and it's easier than you think.  Download and forgive NOW!

 

Easy Guided Meditations to Help You Forgive

Yes, we all agree...forgiveness is important.  But how do we do it?

If you would like to forgive, but you're not sure how to get started, here are three easy processes that you can download and listen to.  All three are easy, relaxing and simple.

  Forgive Someone NOW  $2.99   In this 13 minute meditation you will forgive someone from your present whom you feel is hurtful, annoying, or damaging to you in any way.

  Forgive Your Past NOW  $2.99  In this 18 minute meditation you will forgive a person or event from your past that caused you harm.  Often times, we suppress old hurts and are unaware of how much damage their subconscious memories are causing to our present day lives.  

  Forgive the World NOW  $2.99  Part of being human is creating a story, the story of our life.  Once we create it, we get attached to it.  Forgive the World NOW is an 18 minute meditation to help you release, accept and forgive the story you have created.